Acidity of Regret Ch 67
- Jan 22
- 7 min read
As he watched the woman whose every feature seemed carved in perfect harmony, a figure from his past—both close and distant—flickered in his mind.
It was his own mother, the late Grand Duchess, who had met such a tragic end. She had been beautiful and noble, yet she had wasted her life loving the wrong man, only to end it by her own hand.
Though Declan had claimed his revenge by staging his father’s death as an accident, the guilt he felt for his mother remained like a jagged scar in his heart.
Ah.
He finally understood why he couldn't stop looking at this woman.
It was because she reminded him of his mother.
It wasn't that they looked alike; if one were to place them side by side, there wouldn't be a single shared trait. If anything, they only shared that rare, striking beauty that commanded every eye in the room.
Even though he knew it was a hollow excuse, he forced himself to believe it. He told himself his interest in her was simply because her beauty mirrored the memory of his mother.
If it wasn’t that, he had no way to explain the restless storm brewing inside him.
Declan turned slowly, looking out at the scenery below the balcony just as she did. He hesitated. It wasn't too late to stop. He could still cut down the dark impulse growing like a weed within him.
But then, he remembered the words.
[Hayden] “Declan is a pitiful child.”
This was his chance to finally force Hayden to feel the same sense of inferiority he had lived with his entire life.
[Declan] "This place is quite pleasant."
If he hadn't done this, he would never have been able to make him feel what he felt. Hayden, after all, already had everything.
[Declan] "May I come here again?"
[Vanessa] "You don't need to ask me that, Your Grace. This balcony isn't mine. You may come whenever you wish..."
[Declan] "No."
[Vanessa] "..."
[Declan] "I am asking about you."
[Vanessa] "Pardon?"
[Declan] "If I return, will you be here?"
As he waited for her answer, the rest of the world seemed to fade away. His entire focus narrowed down to her. He tried to tell himself it wouldn't matter if he failed, yet his body was so tense he could hardly move.
Vanessa looked at him, her expression caught between surprise and confusion. To Declan, she seemed almost adorable.
The moment he thought of her as "adorable," he felt a wave of self-loathing. He felt like a complete fool.
[Vanessa] "I suppose... I will be."
When she accepted his hidden proposal, Declan felt his heart give a heavy, violent thud. He convinced himself the excitement was merely the thrill of gaining a weapon for his revenge against Hayden.
He was so simple.
So incredibly blind.
His relationship with Vanessa ripened slowly, but with a deep, crimson intensity.
From the way she met him on the balcony, it was clear she felt nothing for Hayden yet. His goal was to make her fall for him first. He intended to shake her world so thoroughly that there would be no room left for the Crown Prince to enter.
However, the physical intimacy was something even he hadn't anticipated.
Being with her often made him lose his sense of time and place. Before he knew it, he found his lips pressed against hers. For a man who was a stranger to the warmth of others, a kiss was a territory he had never dreamed of exploring.
Is it always this pleasant?
He wondered. He felt a desperate rush when they touched and a lingering ache when they pulled apart. It was just a meeting of lips, yet it felt as though their very souls had brushed against one another. It was a strange, tingling sensation. He found himself kissing her again and again, as if trying to find the exact spot where that feeling began.
Eventually, just seeing her made him feel a sense of thirst. He was becoming so obsessed with this strange ritual that it began to frighten him.
Despite his internal worries, everything proceeded smoothly. Vanessa was gradually falling for him, just as he had planned. With every kiss, the doors to her heart, once firmly shut, began to creak open.
But it wasn't enough. She needed to look at him more. He wanted her eyes to see only him.
Declan pushed further, determined to occupy every corner of her mind. He acted with a blind, aggressive devotion, as if he were the one drowning in love for her.
In truth, he had no experience with romance and had no idea if his actions were right. But perhaps because he viewed this as a plan that could fail at any moment, he was bolder and more composed than ever. That cold confidence only drew her in faster.
Then came the moment he knew she was truly his.
[Vanessa] "Is there... someone else back in the Duchy?"
She bit her lip, her face full of an anxiety she couldn't hide. She couldn't even meet his eyes as she asked. It was pure jealousy.
Declan didn't let it show, but a shiver of triumph ran through him. This woman was so infatuated with him that she was jealous of a person who didn't even exist. It meant there was no space left for Hayden.
He leaned down, pressing a light kiss to her soft lips.
[Declan] "There is no one."
He whispered the words to seal her heart. Vanessa looked dazed for a moment before a small, bright smile broke across her face.
Seeing her genuine joy made his chest feel tight and itchy. It was a feeling he couldn't get used to, so he simply stared deeper at the curve of her smile.
Later, as the night grew late and they left the balcony, they ran into a knight standing in the shadows. He was a man from the Rohawk estate, tasked with guarding her at the banquet.
The moment Vanessa saw him, she jumped as if she had been burned. She immediately stepped in front of Declan, shielding him from view.
Looking at the back of her head, he felt a strange sensation.
Is she... hiding me?
It felt as though she were trying to keep his existence a secret.
He tried to dismiss it as a misunderstanding. She was likely just being cautious; even with her own knight, rumors were dangerous. But as he watched her walk away without looking back, his thoughts shifted.
What if she wasn't being cautious for the sake of a secret? What if she truly didn't want their relationship to be known? What if their time on the balcony was nothing more than a temporary distraction, and in her heart...
Marriage.
What if she intended to marry another man?
When that thought struck him, Declan went rigid as he realized the one possibility he had overlooked.
Stirring her emotions wouldn't be enough to permanently sever her tie to Hayden. Even without love, marriage was always an option. His own parents were proof of that.
[Declan] "..."
He hadn't approached her because he liked her. He had done it to make Hayden feel a sense of loss for the first time. To him, Vanessa Rohawk was supposed to be nothing more than a pretty doll that the Prince wanted to play with.
But the realization that the "doll" could still end up in Hayden’s hands filled him with an unbearable anxiety. His fists clenched tightly.
An instinctive revulsion rose within him.
If I can't have her, he shouldn't either.
The jealousy that had turned as black as ash within him finally bloomed into a cruel intent.
It’s better to break her.
The solution was simple, really.
He would drag this woman down to a place where Hayden could never reach her.
It didn't take much thought to figure out how to ruin Vanessa Rohawk.
Hayden was the Crown Prince. While his royal blood gave him immense power, it was also a shackle of heavy responsibility. The royals had to lead the nobility and maintain a spotless reputation to serve as a model for the Empire.
If he made Vanessa someone the Imperial family could never accept, a marriage between them would become impossible.
While investigating the Count’s family, Declan felt a sense of frustration.
Most of the nobility in the Empire were corrupt beneath their polished exteriors. They feared the Emperor’s power, yet they were busy embezzling funds behind his back. He could have easily ruined most of them with a simple tax audit.
But the Rohawk family—a line that had served the gods for generations—was as clean as a fresh sheet of paper. There wasn't a single flaw to be found. For Declan, who had hoped to find something filthy in their records, it was a disaster.
Left with no choice, he decided to create a crime.
A scandal. Embezzlement. Bribery. Anything would do.
But as he looked further, he realized those things wouldn't cause enough damage. Too many nobles lived perfectly fine lives even after such crimes were exposed. To separate her from Hayden forever, he needed something stronger.
So, he chose treason.
It was the ultimate crime under Imperial law. If she carried that stain, Hayden would never be able to marry her, no matter how much he insisted.
As he set the plan in motion, he occasionally wondered if he was going too far. But every time he imagined Vanessa smiling shyly at Hayden, his blood boiled.
The final nail in the coffin was the news of a royal match. The Emperor and Count Rohawk had met privately, and the reason was exactly what Declan had feared.
He didn't even realize he was being blinded by an emotion he couldn't name. He was becoming exactly like the mother he had loathed and pitied, yet he had no way of seeing it.
Though the Emperor acted generously, he was a man of deep suspicion. Because of this, Declan prepared his trap with meticulous care.
The secret work was carried out not by his aides, but by his most trusted knight, Shiron. Since Declan would handle the paperwork himself, there was no need for others to be involved.
To ensure the plan's success, the number of people who knew the truth had to be kept to an absolute minimum.
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