Acidity of Regret Ch 76
- Jan 28
- 7 min read
His hand moved next toward her wrist.
The clasp of the bracelet Hayden had given her as a substitute for the roses loosened, and the jewelry slid down her skin.
Before she could catch it, the bracelet tumbled to the floor and was immediately hidden beneath his boot, crushed into the ground. It was an act saturated with obsession and a desire for restraint, a clear statement that no trace of the Crown Prince should ever touch her.
She stared down at his boot with a hollow gaze before slowly looking up.
[Vanessa] "I don't want to hear it."
At her cold, frozen response, his pupils stiffened slightly.
[Vanessa] "I have no interest in your thoughts."
The more she spoke with him, the more she suspected that he might be empty inside. After all, he offered nothing but fine-sounding excuses. There was never any truth in the words he spoke or the actions he took; only a plausible facade remained.
Perhaps it was because she could no longer believe him. Her trust and faith in Declan had been completely shattered. All that remained in her heart were lumps of scarred tissue and a deep sense of betrayal.
[Vanessa] "There is no need for us to know such trivial details about each other when we’ve already become strangers."
Her tone was beyond lacking emotion; it was utterly indifferent, devoid of any warmth. This ambiguous temperature—neither hot nor cold—was as unremarkable as the way one would treat a total stranger.
[Declan] "You..."
From her perspective, it was a simple sentence created by the vibration of her vocal cords, but its influence on him was immense. His expression twisted as if he had heard something far too heavy to endure while sober. With every word she spoke, the composure he had fought to maintain crumbled away, layer by layer.
Every time she drew a firm line between them, it felt as though a sharp line was being etched into the center of his heart. It felt as if blood were gushing through a gap splitting along that line. He should have been used to the dull ache spreading through his chest by now, but this particular pain always felt shockingly new.
She watched him intently. It was obvious that his face had grown even darker than before, yet it still wasn't enough to satisfy her. In her eyes, his face was still too composed, too upright.
I want him to crumble and twist even more. I want him to be seized by humiliation and resentment, not just anger.
Because that was what she had endured. Because of what he had done, she had lost everything and fallen into a frustration that she felt more poignantly than anyone else.
Had she not lived each day because she could not die? Because she was still breathing, her lungs continued to open and close, but her heart, at the time, had been no different from someone on the verge of death.
[Vanessa] "The state wedding... it will be moved forward."
As she ruminated on the scar-like emotions she could never forget, no matter how much time passed, her lips parted and began to move of their own accord.
[Vanessa] "As soon as this banquet ends, preparations will begin immediately."
She had told Hayden she would think about it, yet she used the marriage as a weapon in front of Declan without hesitation.
The self-loathing she felt had long since become something she could easily overlook. Acting kindly toward a selfish person was a foolish endeavor, and she had no intention of being such a person when it came to Declan.
[Vanessa] "So, I will soon become the Crown Princess."
When she looked up after delivering news that might be a bolt from the blue to him, the momentum in his eyes had completely broken. It wasn't just a level of denial; his gaze sank deeply, as if plummeting to a bottomless depth. It was a look of utter wretchedness, one that held even less hope than someone witnessing their own ruin.
She suddenly wondered. Was he floundering in such deep despair because of his inferiority complex toward Hayden, or because of the love for her that he claimed so late?
But what did it matter now?
[Vanessa] "Do you still not understand?"
[Declan] "..."
[Vanessa] "The more you struggle to do something, the more it only hurries my marriage to him."
The sound of teeth grinding echoed from between his lips.
[Vanessa] "So now... let’s go our separate ways. I won’t be involved with you anymore. As long as you don't keep acting like this toward me."
From the moment of their reunion at the birthday banquet—where the moonlight had curved secretly, and they both realized they had returned to the past—she had always been bidding him farewell. He acted as if he were deaf, but that didn't mean her words hadn't happened.
His reaction had been different every time. At first, he denied it; then he was sarcastic; then he showed only spite and stubbornness. At one point, he seemed at a loss, and now he spoke of a love she never asked for.
Unlike him, she had not changed. The Vinkart name she had taken after being deceived in the past had been discarded this time. Since no marriage vows existed to bind them, she wished for them to become strangers, each following their own path.
Complete indifference. Complete exclusion.
Any further words would only provide unnecessary openings. She pushed back against his firm chest that blocked her view. With just a light gesture, he was pushed aside easily.
Suddenly, she remembered the times she had laughed while held in these broad arms. Just because memories were tainted did not mean the emotions of that time were also contaminated, so she could not prevent herself from feeling gloomy.
One thing was certain. When she believed he loved her and the direction of her own love was firm, she had been happy.
Although she had lost her family and he was the only one who cared for her, she had often felt emotions she wanted to define as, So this is what happiness is.
Just that far.
Just that far... How wonderful it would have been if our story had ended there. Without knowing any of the pain or chaos that would follow.
[Vanessa] "Then, goodbye."
Her footsteps as she turned away from him were heavier than usual. This time, it was a true farewell. She had no intention of dwelling on the "love" he claimed, even in her dreams.
After leaving the second floor, she did not return to the crowded hall but slipped away to a corner and left the interior. After walking down the hallway for a long time, she eventually entered a waiting room. For some reason, her energy had drained from head to toe, so she slumped onto the sofa.
She felt as if, for the first time, she had properly concluded a conversation with Declan. It was likely because the encounter hadn't resulted in her heart feeling unsettled or their voices being raised as usual.
However, there was something that bothered her. The sharp, piercing glint that had gathered in his pupils for a moment when she pushed his chest.
She shook her head while reflecting on that light—one that chilled one side of her heart so much that she wondered if she had misseen it. Still, seeing as he had let her go so easily, perhaps he had finally understood her intentions this time.
Knock, knock.
She flinched at the sudden sound. Perhaps because she had been ruminating on Declan’s behavior, her heart sank for a moment.
He didn't follow me all the way here, did he?
Holding her breath with a bit of anxiety, she told the visitor they could enter.
To her relief, it was not him who appeared when the door opened.
[Maid] "Lady Rohawk."
It was a woman dressed as an Imperial Palace maid. She entered carrying a tray with tea.
[Vanessa] "What is it?"
[Maid] "His Highness the Crown Prince sent this."
The maid neatly placed the teacup from the tray onto the table in front of the sofa. The dark tea was Darjeeling, the kind she usually enjoyed.
While she stared blankly at the teacup, the maid gave a greeting as if her work were done and disappeared.
Hayden sent this to me? Why didn't he come to see me himself?
She tilted her head and soon guessed the reason.
Hayden must have witnessed it—the scene where she was grabbed and dragged away by Declan on the dance floor.
Since he was a man whose consideration and kindness were always present, the deduction was easy. He was likely giving her some time alone, considering how upset she must be after facing Declan.
Unlike him, Hayden was a man who respected boundaries. Because he prioritized her feelings above his own in any situation, he never created circumstances that she might find unpleasant in the first place.
She lifted the cup and swallowed a sip of tea. As the liquid at the perfect temperature traveled down her throat, a warmth resembling his consideration spread through her previously restless interior. She tilted the cup a few more times.
Time passed until the rising steam had vanished. Suddenly, the strength left the fingers holding the cup. It was not her intention.
Crash—!
The teacup she was holding fell and shattered into pieces with a sharp sound. However, she had no strength or mental clarity left to clean it up. Her vision had suddenly begun to spin.
It was only a moment later that she realized it wasn't her vision spinning, but her body collapsing.
Thump.
Her upper body slumped listlessly onto the sofa, but she couldn't sit up straight. It was because an insane amount of drowsiness rushed over her.
Due to that unnatural sleep, she closed her eyes and drifted off without being able to offer a single moment of resistance.
When she regained consciousness, the first thing she felt was a constant rattling. She slowly rolled up her twitching eyelids. As her faint consciousness returned, her sense of touch became more vivid.
The next thing she felt was a hand gently stroking her hair. The gesture, which reminded her of her father's, was saturated with deep affection.
She blinked her eyes a few times to clear her blurry vision. Then, she realized that her last memory was of the lounge in the banquet hall. At that moment, she bolted upright.
[Declan] "Are you awake?"
As she sat up suddenly, a headache throbbed, causing her to clutch her forehead. Then, she heard a familiar voice.
In the direction her wavering gaze turned, Declan was staring at her.
[Vanessa] "You...!"
His appearance was shocking enough, but what was even more surprising was the background surrounding him. This was not the waiting room where she had fallen asleep.
Her eyes, which had been hurriedly scanning the surroundings, were soon dyed with horror.
She had woken up inside a moving carriage.
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