Acidity of Regret Ch 91
- Feb 10
- 6 min read
Julian shook Declan’s hand off his shoulder, his skin still tingling from the crushing grip. He winced, nursing the lingering ache, and struggled to continue.
[Julian] "It’s obviously an excuse."
[Declan] "An excuse? What do you mean......"
[Julian] "Think. Would she scrap a royal wedding without a plausible lie? Calling off an engagement that massive makes both sides look like fools. A public excuse was mandatory. I heard Lady Rohawk retreated to Evarn County for 'recuperation' right after the announcement."
Declan’s gaze faltered, dropping to the floor.
Is it just a plausible lie? What if her health actually failed?
The memory of her coldness on the day he begged for her forgiveness—stench of cigars and alcohol still clinging to him—refused to fade. Her rejection then had been absolute.
Yet now, she had abandoned the national wedding.
[Julian] "Declan, what are you......"
[Shiron] "My Lord!"
Both men rushed forward, faces pale, as he lurched out of bed.
He had only regained consciousness two weeks after his collapse. The silence he initially experienced stemmed from the massive dosage of anesthesia required for his surgeries. To move now, with a body so mangled and barely stabilized, invited catastrophe.
[Declan] "I must see her myself."
[Julian] "What?"
[Declan] "I need to confirm with my own eyes that she isn’t suffering."
[Julian] "Look at your own body first!"
His frustration reached its boiling point, but Declan ignored the outburst, forcing himself upright.
Shiron caught him as he stumbled, but the knight’s expression mirrored Julian’s alarm.
[Shiron] "My Lord, please....... You require absolute rest."
[Julian] "Listen to him. You literally died and came back."
This wasn't a normal wound from a mundane blade. The power of a monster possessed a destructive force that shattered organs and tore through mana circuits.
Recovery should have taken months. Yet Declan, blinded by the news of Vanessa, dismissed their concerns entirely.
[Physician] "My Lord, stability is paramount. If the sutures tear now, we may not be able to......"
[Declan] "Find the fastest route to Evarn County."
The physician, having heard of the commotion, rushed in to plead, but his words fell on deaf ears.
Declan ignored the collective protests of his household and prepared to depart. With even Julian giving up in exasperation, no one in the castle could bend his iron will.
Ultimately, the physician handed over a satchel of potent recovery potions and herbs laced with numbing agents to dull the agony. Shiron took charge of the supplies.
[Shiron] "My Lord."
He offered a final look of concern, touching the satchel in his cloak, but Declan’s resolve remained unshaken.
If anything, the urgency only intensified. He needed to see her.
If she is actually ill, if the excuse is a reality......
A sour, visceral pain rose in his throat like bile. He gripped the reins and spurred his horse forward.
In truth, he knew this was no time for a leader to abandon his post. During the final battle in the canyon, he had discovered a magical summoning circle unlike anything seen before. Though it required further investigation, the primary suspect was Garten, the City of Mages.
Even before the regression, their visit had been suspicious. They had insisted on entering the Duchy despite the unrest in the canyon—a detail that now gnawed at his mind.
A dozen leads demanded his attention. He should have been pressuring the Garten Kingdom. Instead, every fiber of his being focused solely on Vanessa.
Evarn County sat in the southwest of the Ingzella Empire, a considerable distance from the capital. From the Duchy, the journey required fifteen days of hard riding.
Crisis struck multiple times during the trek.
Declan, barely able to walk, insisted on staying in the saddle. The group’s pace slowed to a crawl as his condition worsened.
At one point, just as the physician feared, his sutures tore. Blood soaked through his clothes, forcing a stop at a nearby village for emergency treatment.
Declan didn't care about the pain. His only frustration was the delay—the precious minutes lost while he was away from her.
It was a level of devotion that would make a bystander shake their head in disbelief.
Finally, after a journey more grueling than the war itself, he reached Evarn. The county was a peaceful sanctuary surrounded by an emerald sea.
Declan recalled from his research into the Rohawk family that they had returned their ancestral lands to the Imperial family generations ago. They had sought to prove their piety and lack of greed, living instead on the hospitality of the Count of Evarn.
None of that mattered. Vanessa was here. That fact alone sustained him.
He headed straight for the Evarn estate on the hill. The quiet mansion overlooked the ocean.
Now that he had arrived, the adrenaline faded, allowing a heavy, throbbing agony to seep into his bones. He gritted his teeth and stood before the gate.
Then, his courage vanished.
[Vanessal] "How dare you show your face here? I told you I never want to see you again. Get out. I can't stand the sight of you."
Her words sat in his chest like lead. He had no intention of repeating his past foolishness, but he feared his mere presence would wound her.
He stood frozen before the rusted gate.
[Guard] "Who......?"
The two guards exchanged nervous glances. The man before them radiated an undeniable, dangerous authority. They asked several times if they should announce him, but Declan refused.
He realized he had acted on impulse. He only wanted to see from a distance that she was safe. If she wasn't actually ill, the agony of the journey would be worth the price.
He hesitated for over an hour, trapped in indecision. Eventually, his strength waned. He pulled the reins to turn back.
[Shiron] "Are you leaving?"
Shiron’s face was a mixture of bewilderment and shock. After watching his lord endure hellish pain to get here, he couldn't believe they were simply retreating.
[Declan] "For now......"
He turned his head, and his world stopped.
[Declan] "Ah......"
His heart plummeted.
She stood there, her glass-like eyes fixed on him. Dina stood behind her, wearing an expression of pure horror, but he saw only Vanessa.
The strength left his legs. He nearly buckled, yet a surge of joy erupted within him.
When their gazes finally locked, he felt as though a thorn had lodged in his throat. He couldn't even swallow.
It was a suffocating pressure—a tension that only she could exert over him.
Vanessa sipped her tea, stealing a glance at the man sitting across from her. Despite his stillness, his massive frame dominated the room.
Her eyes drifted to his wrists peeking from beneath his sleeves and the area near his collar. She had seen the white bandages wrapped tightly around his skin. That was the only reason she hadn't turned him away.
The injuries from the news.
It hadn't been long since the reports of his critical condition. He shouldn't have been traveling, yet his stubbornness had brought him here.
His recklessness exhausted her, but she couldn't ignore the etiquette due to a wounded man—especially one who had just secured the Empire’s peace.
The drawing room remained silent. Ten minutes passed before anyone spoke.
[Declan] "......I am relieved."
His voice was hoarse. He spoke with a cautiousness that suggested he had spent the last ten minutes agonizing over every word.
[Declan] "You don't appear to be ill."
She understood immediately. He was referring to the excuse she used to break the engagement. She finally understood why he had dragged his broken body all this way.
[Vanessa] "I didn't give up the marriage because of you."
Her voice was as calm as the click of her teacup meeting the saucer.
[Vanessa] "Do not harbor any false hope."
[Declan] "I know. That isn't why I came. I only......"
He stopped, scrubbing a hand over his face.
He seemed frustrated by his own lack of eloquence. He was floundering, terrified of her reaction.
She watched him and reflected on the past month.
The time since she arrived at Evarn had been a storm of confusion. The news that Declan might die had triggered an instability she couldn't explain. She was glad no one could read her mind then, because the emotions weren't negative.
She should have felt triumph at the death of her tormentor. Instead, she felt as if the very ground beneath her had vanished.
That realization had horrified her. It sparked a cycle of anger and a suffocating sense of futility.
Declan. He still has this much power over me.
How was this any different from her past self, who lived and breathed for his attention?
It wasn't just annoying anymore; it was terrifying. She feared the endless extension of this bond.
But that fear had finally forged her resolve.
[Vanessa] "I won't make this a long conversation."
Now that she had cut ties with Hayden, it was time to redefine her relationship with Declan. She had to ensure he could never influence her life again. Her eyes sparkled with a new, hardened strength.
[Vanessa] "I recognize that you are genuinely sorry."
[Declan] "Then—"
[Vanessa] "But I don't want your apology. In fact, I no longer want anything from you."
His throat tightened, as if he hadn't tasted water in days. He couldn't even voice his desire to spend a lifetime seeking her forgiveness. Her words sparked a chilling dread that made him clench his fists.
She met his eyes for the first time since they sat down.
[Vanessa] "Therefore...... let our connection end today."
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