KFBRV Ch 59

The last time she had checked, his Loathing level stood at 60.

The urgent reason for her to return home had vanished for the moment. If she wanted to wring out his compassion and lower his Loathing level, now was the time.

Just then, she felt a familiar pressure in her chest, as if her lungs were trying to expel something.

[Odette] “Cough! Cough!”

As expected, a violent fit of coughing erupted. Her right hand, which she used to cover her mouth, was quickly drenched in crimson.

When she stole a glance at his face, she saw exactly what she had anticipated: he had turned deathly pale.

Just as I thought. My guess was right.

[Johan] “Damn it, are you okay? Lie down right now. Do you even realize you're a patient? You are sick. Just... lie down on the bed for now.”

Johan, who usually moved with the disciplined grace of a soldier following a strict code, was uncharacteristically frantic as he helped her lie back down.

She wondered how she could deepen his guilt. How could she squeeze out even more of his pity?

She didn't have to contemplate for long.

[Odette] “I’m sorry. I’ve ruined the blankets. I’ll clean up the blood myself. Could you tell me where the laundry room is—”

It was enough to imagine how she would have had to act if she were currently at the Count’s estate.

Upon hearing her fragile, submissive voice, he looked as though he had been struck.

[Johan] “You……”

His expression mirrored that of a man who had lost his empire—or perhaps someone whose very foundation of belief had been shattered.

[Johan] “That’s enough…… It’s fine, so… just lie down. Please.”

She ignored his trembling voice and pushed herself up, grabbing a nearby handkerchief. She began to scrub at the bedding with forced intensity, trying to wipe away the blood.

[Odette] “……”

He stared at her, seemingly at a loss for words.

[Johan] “Stop it, Odette. Please. Do you have any idea how pale your face is right now? You just coughed up blood. You shouldn’t be moving like this.”

It was already working. He had called her ‘Odette.’

That was a name he hadn't used since they first met three years ago. During their few subsequent encounters, he had addressed her as Lady Odette, but once their relationship soured, he stopped using her name entirely. He wouldn't call her anything but her surname, even if his life depended on it.

Though it might have been spurred by the urgency of the moment, hearing her name was a highly encouraging achievement.

[Odette] “Coughing up blood isn't that big of a deal. How could I let a maid clean up something so filthy? Please, let me do it myself.”

He flinched at her words, his expression hardening. He loosened his tie as if he were suffocating, then snatched the handkerchief from her hand.

[Johan] “What is filthy? Why would your blood be filthy?”

His voice had dropped an octave, simmering with a low, controlled anger.

[Johan] “What do I have to do to make you rest? Do I need to tie your arms to the bed?”

[Odette] “Pardon?”

Wait, this is going a bit further than I expected.

[Johan] “Do you think I won’t? If you don’t want to be tied to the bed, stay still.”

With those words, he gripped her shoulders and forced her back onto the mattress before irritably yanking the bell pull.

When an imperial servant came rushing in, he barked orders with a ferocious intensity.

[Johan] “Bring hot water and medicine! Hurry!”

Then, looking frustrated, he stormed out of the room with long strides, only to return moments later carrying a fresh, white quilt.

Huh……?

She was stunned by the sheer absurdity of the situation.

I was planning to act out a performance of being overwhelmed by his grace, but I didn't actually want to be this overwhelmed.

Yet, he seemed determined to do just that. He personally began the task of changing the bedding—a chore usually reserved for a maid.

Everything happened so quickly that by the time she snapped out of her daze, a new quilt was already tucked around her.

That quilt looked quite heavy, yet he moved with such speed…… Ah, right. He’s a Transcendent.

Good heavens, now he was picking up the blood-stained sheets to take them to the laundry room himself. Judging by his momentum, it looked like he intended to wash them with his own hands.

Feeling panicked, she tried to stop him.

[Odette] “Wait a moment. Your Highness doesn't need to do this……”

[Johan] “I am a soldier before I am a Crown Prince. Just think of me as a common private and accept the service.”

A common private? Is he insane? You are a Naval Admiral. If actual soldiers heard this, they'd lose their minds.

[Odette] “Isn't it the other way around? You are the Crown Prince before you are a soldier. You weren't exactly born into the military, were you........”

[Johan] “It’s the same.”

[Odette] “No, Your Highness. There is no need for you to serve me—”

[Johan] “Enough. I’d rather clean it myself than listen to you call your own blood filthy.”

Despite her active protests, he organized the bedding with the perfect, sharp angles of a seasoned military veteran before leaving the room. It was a level of bed-making that even the most skilled maid couldn't hope to match.

[Odette] “……”

What is this? This isn't the flow I wanted.

By the time she regained her composure, she was tucked under a fresh, crisp quilt without a single drop of blood in sight.

He had returned after finishing the task and practically forced her to lie down.

Now that I think about it…… Johan was always the type to exert himself physically whenever he felt guilty.

[Odette] “Um. Uh, yes…… thank you.”

[Johan] “It’s fine.”

He furrowed his brow and sat in the chair next to the bed, crossing his arms.

[Johan] “Do you really have to go back to the Count’s estate? It doesn't seem like they even feed you properly there.”

[Odette] “Pardon?”

[Johan] “Those damn bastards take only the most precious things in the Empire because they are the family of the Purifier……. And yet, the Purifier herself is suffering from malnutrition and lung disease.”

[Odette] “……”

[Johan] “If you come to the Crown Prince’s palace, I will ensure you are protected from the Count and provide everything you desire.”

Of course, he didn't know that she was only staying in that mansion to exact her revenge on the Albrecht family. Zion wouldn't have reported the details of their deal.

And naturally, she had no intention of telling Johan about her revenge.

Telling someone so upright would only increase his Loathing level.

She would only be subjected to some self-righteous lecture.

[Odette] “It’s difficult, Your Highness. If I, an unmarried woman, were to stay at the Crown Prince’s palace, my already bottomed-out reputation would only sink further.”

[Johan] “Then…… what if you were under the protection of the Empress’ palace?”

[Odette] “I’m fine, Your Highness. I do not wish for the protection of the Imperial Family.”

She shook her head with a small smile.

At her refusal, he wiped his face with his hand in frustration.

[Johan] “Odette, I understand that you don’t want to answer me regarding the affairs of the Count’s house.”

After a brief silence, he spoke with a voice heavy with a sense of responsibility.

[Johan] “……Then at least tell me this. Is there anything I can do to help you? It can be something as trivial as you like.”

His blue eyes stared straight at her. It was the gaze of a knight. A gaze that said he would jump into action the moment she said ‘yes.’

She shook her head.

[Odette] “No. There is nothing for Your Highness to do.”

Now was not the time to alleviate his guilt; it was the time to add to it. Receiving help from him now was meaningless. No matter what he could do for her, it couldn't possibly be as valuable as the guilt he would carry in the future.

A guilt that will prevent him from hunting me down even if he realizes I’m a fake.

A guilt that will make him hesitate for a split second, even if he feels a murderous intent to kill me when his Loathing level is multiplied.

Despite her firm answer, Johan looked as though he wanted to say more.

But at that moment, the sound of rushing water—a loud shaaaaa—broke the silence. It was the sound of the massive fountain outside the window springing to life.

[Odette] “……”

[Johan] “……”

It was the garden’s crystal fountain, built for the balls of the summer social season. During those balls, the fountain would be filled with chilled wine to cool the sweltering nights. It seemed they were testing it in preparation for the social season starting in a few days.

The social season is almost here.

Watching the rehearsal, it didn't quite feel real. In her previous life, there had been no social balls during this summer. As the Crown Prince’s berserk episodes grew more severe, the Imperial Palace hadn't been in a position to host such events.

Her mother, who had missed the Empress’ salon, would undoubtedly insist on attending this ball since her father was away. And Odette would have to follow.

Gazing at the magnificent scenery outside, she spoke to him.

[Odette] “Ah. There is one thing. Something you can help with.”

She spoke in a slightly lighter tone.

[Odette] “Please hate me just a little bit less, Your Highness.”

Recalling the Loathing level of 60, she offered him a smile.

He stared at her in silence.

[Johan] “……Odette.”

[Odette] “Yes, Your Highness.”

[Johan] “I didn't know. That you were living in such a hell.”

His voice sounded strained, as if he were being choked. His sunken blue eyes reminded her of the deep sea.

[Johan] “If I had known, I wouldn't have left you there. You were so small. I would have used any means necessary to save you.”

[Odette] “I know. The moment you realized I was being abused, you would have tried to rescue me from that house.”

[Johan] “I know I am very late, but even now—”

[Odette] “Because if I weren't an abuse victim, you could hate me without any burden on your conscience.”

She had clearly hit the mark.

He fell silent at her response, his face twisting into an expression of pain. It seemed his moral code was holding him back, even as he felt an unavoidable hatred for her. And because of that, he was feeling guilty all over again.

Even now, he had said.

Perhaps in her previous life, that would have meant something. But in this life, such help was worse than nothing.

[Odette] “Salvation that comes too late is not salvation at all. Your Highness, I no longer wait for someone to pull me out of hell. I don’t need it anymore.”

[Johan] “……”

[Odette] “The only way you can help me is by hating me a little less.”

This was the truth. She wasn't blaming him. She was telling him that she desperately needed his Loathing level to be lower.

[Johan] “……”

He remained silent, lost in thought.

She intended to wait for his answer, but she couldn't keep her eyes open. Her eyelids were growing heavy.

[Odette] “I’m not asking you not to hate me, just to hate me a little less. Is that so difficult……?”

Perhaps because she was so drowsy, the thoughts in her head tumbled out of her mouth.

[Johan] “Odette.”

He called her name, but between the exhaustion of coughing up blood and the effects of the medicine kicking in, she was too tired.

She drifted off into a deep sleep. She thought she heard him murmuring something, but she couldn't make it out.

When she finally opened her eyes, she was back in her room at the mansion.

She knew instinctively that Johan had brought her back. And she was certain that his Loathing level had dropped by exactly the amount of guilt he felt today.

She didn't regret not being able to check his Loathing level. His deep silence had given her all the assurance she needed—she had left a profound impression on him today.

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