TSMMT Ch 167

The Meaning of Life

She had once assumed nothing would change in this life. The inevitable had happened anyway.

Guiscard Lodbrog had claimed Dianna Brienne as his wife once more, Panborough had fallen, and her own house had crumbled into ruin.

As foretold, the rivers of blood couldn't be stopped. Yet now she understood. It was not the work of immutable fate. It was the product of unyielding willpower, a chain of cause and effect forged by human actions under distinct circumstances. Though unchanged in its broad strokes, fate had revealed a different face.

Though tragic, the world had become slightly warmer for Guiscard. Their bond was no longer at its worst, granting Dianna the composure to truly see him. She had confessed her love to him, and he had responded with a joyful smile.

On a quiet night during their journey back from Panborough to Lodbrog, Guiscard had shared his story.

He spoke of his life as a hidden prince of the Lodbrog Kingdom, the indifference of the woman he assumed was his mother, and the unpredictable actions of his true mother.

He recounted his past with calm detachment, not to excuse his turn into a tyrant, but as an answer to Dianna's quiet curiosity. It was his life.

As he spoke, Guiscard appeared somber at times, while his eyes sparkled at others, deeply gratified that someone sought to understand the desolate depths of his soul.

Then he inquired about Dianna. As he listened to her story, he flared with anger or spat foul curses.

It was a time of mutual understanding. A time tinged with a delicate sorrow.

After those revelations, Guiscard craved more, yet both ultimately recognized that they were distinct individuals.

As she watched Guiscard sleep, she pictured his past existence: a life lived as a servant to his own mother, ignorant of his royal lineage.

He had witnessed the woman he considered his mother (the maid) decapitated by monsters, an atrocity orchestrated by his birth mother. He had wailed in grief without even comprehending his sorrow when Herya perished at the hands of Dianna's father.

Though he spoke with indifference, his insistence on remembering proved those events remained carved wounds within his soul.

After gaining his freedom, he narrowly escaped death at the hands of the men Duke Brienne had released, later risking his life to slay Fafnir.

Having endured every tragedy imaginable, he had lived a profoundly miserable, pitiable, and desolate existence.

Should a man who suffered so much not taste a measure of happiness now?

Life could never be entirely free of adversity, yet should he not be allowed to experience manageable hardships and savor a little peace?

Why must such cruelty endlessly target Guiscard?

Did the dragon who cherished her own daughter harbor hatred for her daughter's son?

Why must fate prove so merciless?

You deserve to be happy.

Whether I am by your side or not, you should smile without fear.

You ought to find stability in human bonds, live free from threats to your life, and thrive beside someone who cherishes you.

Tears spilled from Dianna's eyes. She longed to see Guiscard.

---

Guiscard pressed his brow, exhausted. As if their journey from the Holy See through Panborough had been his final respite, a barrage of crises erupted upon their return.

First, he executed Duke Levian's family following a formal trial. The discovery of Lady Levian's corpse had provoked fierce resistance from the duke, forcing Guiscard to conceal the truth before suspicious rumors regarding her death could circulate.

In Lodbrog, murdering a pregnant woman was a capital offense. With the nobility in an uproar over the corpse's discovery, five physicians testified that Lady Levian had not been pregnant, while maids from the ducal estate confirmed she had menstruated until recently.

She had never carried a child. Even so, Duke Levian uttered a harrowing curse as he met his end.

[D. Levian] "To snatch away the life of an innocent child! Divine retribution shall strike you down, you demonic bastard!"

Guiscard felt neither fear nor intimidation at the outburst. It merely left a foul taste in his mouth.

Furthermore, individuals influenced by the duke's hatred were beginning to make unsettling moves.

Additionally, conflicts erupted across several regions over the distribution of the grain Dianna had secured, giving rise to bandits targeting food supplies.

On top of that...

Encountering the deceased Fafnir left a lingering sense of foreboding. Those damned dragons spoke as though an alternate world existed, tossing around phrases like "the previous world" and "myself in this life."

The real problem was that Dianna appeared to understand those cryptic terms. Guiscard felt like an illiterate slave once more.

It evoked memories of the days when Dianna and Philip exchanged letters in a language he couldn't read, bringing back the overwhelming powerlessness, despair, and shame of being entirely excluded.

Once again, he felt like a child who couldn't read. His eyes sank into dark shadow.

Damn it, damn it, damn it...

[Guiscard] "Damn you, Dianna Brienne."

He muttered the curse under his breath, pinching the bridge of his nose as a throbbing headache set in. Lately, nightmares had robbed him of sleep.

[Dianna] "Why are you swearing again?"

He raised his head in surprise and found her standing before him, a bright smile gracing her lips.

[Dianna] "I heard you as I walked in."

Failing to hear her footsteps... I must be growing dull.

He curled his lips into a cold smirk at his own perceived inadequacy.

[Guiscard] "What brings you here?"

[Dianna] "I missed you."

At her words, his eyes widened slightly before darkening as he lowered his gaze once more. She approached him gently and examined his face.

[Dianna] "You are exhausted, are you not?"

[Guiscard] "..."

[Dianna] "It must be terribly exhausting."

She stepped closer to the seated king, gently cradling his head against her chest.

He offered no resistance, letting his head rest in her arms.

[Guiscard] "Why did you come?"

Her expression stiffened at his cold, businesslike query. Though she had confessed her love, Guiscard remained unchanged at his core, convinced she would never seek him out without a specific reason.

She let out a quiet sigh and spoke.

[Dianna] "I came because I missed you."

A sharp, hollow laugh escaped his lips, a sound devoid of warmth or joy.

[Guiscard] "Right."

He gave a subtle nod, his gaunt face reflecting a bleak emptiness like a dried, barren branch rather than joy.

Previously, a single word from Dianna would have filled him with delight.

Why is he acting like this?

Feeling a prick of irritation, she checked her own demeanor.

Could my attitude have seemed condescending?

Expecting him to feel immense gratitude because she visited out of affection was the height of arrogance.

[Dianna] "Guiscard, you are busy."

[Guiscard] "Yes. Why do you not return to your quarters? You are busy as well."

His voice and expression were chillingly distant. Dianna sensed an unsettling rift in his cool demeanor and released her embrace.

She looked at him with an unreadable expression. She lowered her head and spoke with forced composure.

[Dianna] "Forgive me, Your Majesty. I have wasted your valuable time."

[Guiscard] "..."

[Dianna] "I shall take my leave."

Damn you, Dianna Brienne.

Guiscard was cursing her inwardly, and Dianna knew it well. She had heard how desperately he worked to cover up Saruvia's murder, resolving the complications her actions had spawned.

He must be sensitive. Frustrated. That is why he curses me.

[Guiscard] "Don't venture outside the palace. I heard you left the grounds recently. The palace is not a place for you to come and go as you please. You ought to be aware of the current atmosphere."

He issued an icy warning. Dianna nodded weakly, offering neither an apology nor a smile in return.

As she gazed into his cold violet eyes, a chilling weight settled in her chest. Suddenly, memories of her past life, where she had done nothing but stare at his receding back, surfaced. She clenched her hands tightly.

---

Adelheit observed Dianna, the Queen who had saved Lodbrog and the most powerful woman in the realm.

The foreign Queen, who commanded overwhelming support from commoners and nobles alike, rested her chin on her hand at an outdoor table, staring blankly at the sky.

She wore a wide-brimmed hat adorned with flowers, a striking combination of the Panborough custom of placing flowers in one's hair and the Lodbrog fashion of wide-brimmed sun hats.

Exquisitely beautiful, Dianna Brienne looked lost in deep sorrow.

Her airy, cotton-candy-like gown fluttered gently in the breeze, an attire somewhat ill-suited for the crisp, chilly autumn weather.

Adelheit approached her step by step.

[Adelheit] "Boo!"

She flinched in surprise. As he offered a cheerful grin, a soft smile returned to her lips.

[Dianna] "What brings you here?"

[Adelheit] "Shall we call it the instinct of a man unable to pass by a beautiful lady?"

[Dianna] "Oh, please."

He chuckled as he spoke the sweet words.

[Dianna] "What of Neust Academy?"

[Adelheit] "Classes are temporarily suspended. According to Tarascus, a major crisis might erupt soon."

[Dianna] "..."

[Adelheit] "Is it not better for everyone to remain in their homes?"

She nodded quietly.

He sat beside her with the casual air of a libertine, feigning innocence before whispering.

[Adelheit] "Is your love life going poorly?"

He offered an alluring smile like a rogue making a flirtatious advance.

Her eyes widened in surprise.

[Adelheit] "Why? Are you startled?"

[Dianna] "No..."

Though his tone was lighthearted, his concern for her was genuine.

[Adelheit] "We are good friends, Dian."

A soft chuckle escaped her lips. At the word "friends," she spoke without thinking.

[Dianna] "I see glimpses of a painful past in him."

[Adelheit] "..."

[Dianna] "That is why I feel anxious. What will become of me? Will I be forced to live a desolate life once more, staring only at his back?"

At her confession, he rolled his eyes slightly before speaking in a low, grounded voice.

[Adelheit] "That must have been your past life."

Dianna froze in utter shock.

---

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