WMEEM Ch 19

Nagging

Preparations for the engagement ceremony progressed steadily. Aside from fitting the gown for that day, my daily routine remained unchanged. However, I took a rest day to preserve my health.

A slight shift also occurred. While I used to share dinner with Terkan, I spent that time with Batizo following the ball. Why he suddenly initiated this remained unclear.

Initially uncomfortable, swallowing food proved difficult, yet over time it grew manageable. Though Batizo's stern features and manner of speech remained unchanged, a subtle softness touched his eyes.

Furthermore, he presented me with gifts frequently of late. Tossing a small box onto the table today, I assumed it was another ring. I had lost count of how many he had given me.

An attendant retrieved the tossed box and set it before me.

[Celeste] "Is this another ring? You have given me so many already."

[Batizo] "Have you grown tired of rings?"

[Celeste] "Hardly."

Shaking my head, I opened the box. Extracting a ring studded with delicate gems, I slipped it onto my finger and showed him.

Whenever receiving a ring from him, I slipped it on immediately to show him, yet he barely glanced at it.

Today as well, he merely offered a passing glance while sipping his liquor.

[Celeste] "It is not that I dislike them. I possess plenty, so you don't need to present more. Besides, spending such vast sums constantly seems excessive."

[Batizo] "Did I not assure you my treasury is plentiful?"

[Celeste] "I am not questioning your finances. I mean my jewelry box will overflow."

[Batizo] "I shall provide a larger jewelry box next time."

He was surprisingly simple-minded. A gentle smile touched my lips as I looked at him.

[Celeste] "No, what I mean is that I am content with what I have received. You don't need to purchase them on my account."

[Batizo] "I didn't purchase it for you."

[Celeste] "Pardon?"

As his glass emptied, an attendant stepped forward to pour liquor. Once half-filled with crimson wine, he swallowed it in a single gulp, unlike his previous slow sips.

[Batizo] "...I found it. I picked it up."

[Celeste] "Ah, you found it. Seeing as it is packaged, it looks like a gift intended for someone else. The owner who lost it must be upset. Should we not locate the owner?"

Quickly slipping the ring off my finger, I placed it back into the box.

[Batizo] "Anyone capable of purchasing such a ring will not fret over losing it. It matters not, so keep it."

A costly ring surely came from Luiza, and patrons of such an establishment might not fret over a single piece, yet what if someone spent their hard-earned savings to purchase a gift?

Regardless of wealth, it might represent a meaningful gift to someone.

I pushed the box away.

[Celeste] "Still... taking someone else's gift feels improper."

[Batizo] "I told you it is fine!"

He barked loudly. His stern features crumpled further into a scowl.

Fearing he would grow angrier if I refused the new ring, I quickly clasped the box.

[Celeste] "Understood. I shall treasure it. Thank you."

Draining another glass, he gestured with his finger toward me.

[Batizo] "Hand it here."

[Celeste] "Return the ring to you?"

[Batizo] "You claimed it felt improper."

[Celeste] "Since you deem it fine, I am fine as well."

[Batizo] "Who would believe you are fine when your face betrays otherwise? Hand it here."

Moving to explain that my face betrayed discomfort because he shouted, I released my hold on the box instead.

An attendant stepped forward, retrieved the box, and set it beside Batizo, prompting him to order it discarded.

[Celeste] "Why discard it?"

[Batizo] "Discarding ownerless items is proper."

Locating the owner is proper. Inquiring with the shopkeeper at Luiza would yield answers.

Throwing it away was far too wasteful.

[Celeste] "Give it to me."

[Batizo] "For what purpose?"

[Celeste] "I shall seek the owner, and if none appears, I shall keep it."

The corner of his mouth twitched upward. Looking at me, then at the box, he gestured toward it with his chin after a long pause.

[Batizo] "Hand it to her."

At his command, the attendant placed the box before me once more.

Keeping it was far better than discarding it, and making an effort to find the owner first brought peace of mind.

Though his expression remained stern, the anger flared earlier had softened.

[Celeste] "You seem to be eating very little lately."

I spoke to shift the mood, though my words held truth. He consumed far more liquor than food.

[Batizo] "I lack an appetite."

[Celeste] "Why not force yourself to eat a little? Ruining your health will not do."

[Batizo] "Nagging from Terkan alone suffices. Must you join in as well?"

[Celeste] "My apologies. I worried for your health... I shall exercise caution."

Setting down his glass, Batizo sliced a piece of meat and placed it into his mouth.

Once, twice—punctuated by sips of liquor—he ate continuously.

[Batizo] "I don't dislike it, so feel free to continue."

[Celeste] "To what do you refer?"

[Batizo] "The... that... you know. The nag..."

[Celeste] "What?"

[Batizo] "...The nagging!"

[Celeste] "Yes. I shall do so."

Spoken like a man who detested it, yet reality proved otherwise. Seeing his stumbling speech brought an involuntary smile to my face.

Did spending more time together cause this?

Gradually witnessing new sides of him, contradicting my previous perceptions, brought pleasant surprise.

Thus, beyond becoming Empress of Kellinev, becoming his wife began to feel like a prospect worth anticipating.

---

[Batizo] "It seems I have gone mad."

He spoke gravely.

[Batizo] "Why did I say a lie?"

He had not picked up the ring given to Celeste today. It was a gift purchased for her. Nothing special. Terkan bought every ring presented to Celeste.

He could have stated the truth, so why lie? Ponder as he might, an answer eluded him.

[Batizo] "And why did I shout at her?"

He voiced his confusion endlessly. Listening silently, Terkan inquired.

[Terkan] "You ought to discover why you persist in giving gifts first."

[Batizo] "The reason is singular: because the Princess enjoys them."

[Terkan] "Does her joy upon receiving gifts bring joy to you as well?"

[Batizo] "Her smile is beautiful."

Receiving a gift box, observing Celeste's shifting expressions as she examined the ring brought an involuntary smile to his own face. Of course, Batizo tightened his lips to conceal it from her and the attendants.

And that nagging.

Nagging from Terkan felt like an extension of official duties. Knowing it served his best interest, he endured it, though finding it mostly burdensome. Yet Celeste's words provoked neither annoyance nor irritation.

Moving to mention her nagging, Batizo changed his words quickly. He wished to keep that detail hidden from Terkan for reasons unknown.

[Batizo] "Bizarre."

[Terkan] "In what regard?"

[Batizo] "She doesn't resemble an abused person."

He knew she harbored a desire for vengeance against Raff. Aside from that, she appeared like a princess raised in a normal environment.

[Batizo] "Is it because of your guidance, Terkan?"

[Terkan] "I accomplished very little."

[Batizo] "Indeed. Yet you were by my side as well... so why am I like this?"

Raised in a similar environment, Batizo had grown thoroughly twisted. Though calmed thanks to Terkan, a few years prior, uncontrollable rage drove him to swing his sword, severing heads and slashing bodies indiscriminately.

[Terkan] "Her Highness is Her Highness, and Your Majesty is Your Majesty. How could two humans be identical?"

[Batizo] "Because we differ too drastically."

[Terkan] "It seems you have developed an interest in Her Highness."

[Batizo] "Perhaps."

Batizo didn't deny it. Walking through the palace, his eyes followed Celeste whenever she strolled in the garden. Even when attempting not to look, hearing her laughter turned his head involuntarily.

Surprised by his body's automatic reactions, he felt a strange sense of amusement. At times, a strange sensation, as if a heavy boulder pressed against his chest, left him bewildered.

What is this? Why am I like this?

Searching for an answer, Batizo concluded one thing: it resulted from keeping no woman by his side for a long period.

Shortly after Celeste's arrival, no woman entered his bedchamber. Removing potential distractions for his severe insomnia drove that decision, rather than Celeste's presence.

Regardless, the reason for his sudden fixation on the Princess was simple.

[Batizo] "It must be because I have spent so many nights alone recently."

Fixating on Celeste and acting uncharacteristically stemmed from spending increased time together. While her beauty was undeniable, Kellinev had plenty of women of equal beauty.

[Terkan] "Do you require someone?"

Terkan asked in a quiet voice.

Stroking his chin with his index finger, Batizo offered a short nod.

---

Waking early in the morning, I stepped outside.

At such an early hour, Eli—who usually guarded the entrance—was nowhere to be seen, so I informed the sentries and maids before embarking on a brief walk.

Though early winter, temperatures plummeted suddenly, mimicking Calyx's midwinter.

Abandoning my walk, I returned indoors.

Despite Batizo's permission, absorbing myself in studies had prevented me from exploring the palace, prompting me to wander wherever my feet led me.

The palace corridors felt desolate. Compared to these hallways, my bedroom and reception room were warm, bright spaces.

During my childhood, Calyx's corridors overflowed with flowers and paintings, warm sunlight pouring through grand windows. Here was the exact opposite. Narrow windows admitted little light, and paintings or flowers were nowhere to be found. A space differing little from the garden.

Continuing along, I discovered a spiral staircase at the end of the corridor. Unfitting for the grand scale of the palace, it was a narrow staircase accommodating only a single person.

Lacking a handrail to hold, I pressed my hand against the wall. Dampness made it slick and ice-cold.

Though the forbidding atmosphere urged hesitation, I stepped onto the first stair as if bewitched.

Torches mounted sparsely along the wall illuminated the steps, yet black shadows covered large patches, stirring a faint dread.

Gasping for breath, I halted my ascent. Lacking a single window along the climb, I lost track of how many floors I had scaled. Contemplating turning back, having climbed this far pushed me to reach the top.

Light began to flicker ahead.

Have I finally arrived?

Just around the curve, faint voices reached my ears.

Someone was there. Absorbed in conversation, they had not heard my footsteps.

Debating whether to descend or announce my presence and explore the summit, I chose the latter, clearing my throat.

The conversation cut off abruptly, and approaching footsteps echoed, prompting me to climb further.

Turning to the wall to identify the person, we stared at each other in surprise.

[Terkan] "What brings you here, Your Highness?"

He asked from a few steps above.

[Celeste] "I was wandering and discovered it by chance... What about you?"

[Terkan] "A place I visit frequently to clear my head."

[Celeste] "Are you alone? I heard voices."

[Terkan] "It is only me."

It was undeniably a conversation. Peering past Terkan to check if someone stood behind him, his tall frame blocked my view.

As if inviting me to verify, Terkan stepped aside to clear the path. No one was there.

[Celeste] "Did I mishear?"

[Terkan] "Human eyes, noses, and ears occasionally convey false information."

With Terkan denying it and no one present, insisting I heard clearly was impossible. As he noted, my ears might have conveyed false information.

[Celeste] "What lies above?"

[Terkan] "An observatory."

Climbing a few turns, a small window came into view. Looking outside, the realization of the height made me step back. Had I seen the height through windows along the climb, I would never have reached this place.

The small window framed a picture-like landscape. Views of Kellinev, invisible from my room, unfolded before me. Dense forests spanned the edge of vast plains, backed by snow-capped mountains.

A strong gust of wind blew past, urging me to press my hand against the wall.

[Celeste] "Kellinev is a magnificent realm."

[Terkan] "Watching snow fall from this vantage point clears one's mind completely."

Even without witnessing it, I believed his words. Imagining the grand sight of falling and accumulating snow, reality would surely surpass my imagination.

[Terkan] "Does the ring suit your taste?"

Turning my head toward him at the sudden question, his eyes rested upon my hand against the wall. Specifically, the ring adorning my finger. The ring presented by Batizo days ago.

[Celeste] "I adore everything His Majesty bestows."

[Terkan] "Do you adore it because it is his gift, or do you adore the ring itself?"

[Celeste] "I adore it because it is his gift."

There was no need for prolonged thought. Fondness for jewels had flared briefly, yet meant little to me now. It held meaning because Batizo presented it. Had he gifted wildflowers, I would have accepted them with equal joy.

Terkan gazed down at me silently. A sharp, unfamiliar glint flared within his ruby eyes. A look absent for quite some time.

Tilting his head slightly, a faint sigh escaped his lips. A sudden chill filled the air.

[Terkan] "It seems you have developed feelings for His Majesty."

Even in a low tone, a chilling coldness lingered. His narrowed eyes demanded an answer.

[Celeste] "Is that forbidden?"

Experiencing this for the first time, discerning what feelings I held for Batizo eluded even me.

[Celeste] "Since we are to marry anyway, is it not far better than indifference?"

Even if not love, mutual respect and interest would foster a far superior bond.

[Terkan] "What if His Majesty doesn't welcome your feelings?"

An unconsidered possibility.

[Terkan] "What if His Majesty offers no response to your heart?"

I wished to claim I expected nothing, yet the words refused to form, for that would be a lie. I had welcomed the attention Batizo displayed toward me.

[Terkan] "His Majesty is not a man who can fulfill your expectations."

[Celeste] "...I know."

Spending time with Batizo recently, I had deluded myself once more, assuming his gifts and softened eyes signaled a shift in our relationship. Expecting something from a union forged on contractual terms.

A sudden chill made me wrap my arms around myself. Cold air circulating around us pierced my chest.

Unbuttoning his coat unexpectedly, Terkan removed it and draped it over my shoulders.

[Celeste] "It is fine... Ah!"

Wrapping his coat around me, Terkan pulled me close with firm pressure. As my movements were restricted, he leaned down close to my face and whispered.

[Terkan] "Wish for nothing, and expect nothing."

[Celeste] "..."

[Terkan] "He commanded me to conduct your instruction for the wedding night."

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