Acidity of Regret Ch 66
- Jan 22
- 7 min read
Since the day he overheard that conversation, Declan had ceased to view Hayden as a friend. If he still agreed to meet him, it was only because he was no longer a child who let private grudges dictate his alliances.
Exposing one's raw emotions was a fool’s errand; it was nothing more than handing an enemy a map to one’s weaknesses. His mother was the perfect example. She had laid bare every ounce of her desperate love, effectively surrendering her freedom into the hands of others.
Furthermore, he was no longer a mere heir—he was the Grand Duke. With the reputation of the Vinkart name resting on his shoulders, every movement had to be calculated and precise.
Facing Hayden was actually easier now. Once he decided they were not friends, he no longer felt the need to suppress his negative feelings. The struggle in their relationship had never been the jealousy itself, but his exhausting attempts to erase it.
[Hayden] "I don’t know what to do. I really don't."
Declan watched him. Usually, the Prince was a fountain of smiles, but today his face was clouded with worry.
Hayden, entirely unaware that Declan had overheard his parents and subsequently closed his heart, spoke with his usual blunt honesty.
[Hayden] "I think I’ve fallen in love at first sight."
Declan felt a flicker of annoyance. Hayden was acting as if he were facing the greatest crisis in imperial history over something so trivial.
[Declan] "Is that all?"
[Hayden] "I’m serious. I stood near her, and my heart actually started racing."
[Declan] "Who is she?"
[Hayden] "Perhaps you’ve heard of her? Lady Rohawk."
Hayden clutched his chest as if he were in physical pain.
Rohawk?
Declan crossed his legs and searched his memory. It didn't take long. She was the daughter of a Count whose beauty was famous not only in the capital but even in the far reaches of the Duchy.
[Declan] "I’ve heard the name."
[Hayden] "Have you met her?"
[Declan] "No."
Because he had never seen her, he couldn't understand why the Prince was making such a scene.
[Hayden] "I’d heard the rumors, of course, but our paths never crossed. She only made her debut right around the time I left to study abroad. So, this banquet was the first time I actually saw her..."
He trailed off, his eyes turning misty as if he were reliving the moment in his head.
[Hayden] "I didn't think it was possible for a human being to be that beautiful."
It was absurd to see a man so completely undone by a woman, yet it felt strangely new. In all the years they had known each other, Hayden had never spoken of matters of the heart.
The meeting ended shortly after, with Declan forced to listen to the Prince's dazed ramblings of love.
Rohawk.
Declan slowly repeated the name Hayden had uttered with such reverence.
He finally encountered the lady herself a few days later, at the banquet held in honor of Hayden’s birthday.
He detested banquets.
He hated the crowds that clung to him like leeches, the repetitive questions that made people sound like parrots, and the forced smiles required to maintain his status. For a man who valued silence, such events were a special kind of torture.
They were shallow, tedious affairs.
Yet, shortly after entering the hall, Declan spotted her.
She was impossible to miss. Even in a sea of people, she stood out as if she were a masterpiece painted in a different style than the rest of the world.
Under the glow of the chandeliers, her honey-blonde hair shimmered with a healthy luster, and her pale skin appeared both delicate and regal. Her features were so perfectly balanced that describing them felt redundant.
He had intended to have no interest in Hayden’s unrequited crush. Yet, strangely, he couldn't look away. He sipped his drink, feigning indifference, but his gaze kept drifting back to where she stood.
He realized what he was doing by the fifth time he turned his head toward Vanessa Rohawk.
This is madness. Why am I acting like a fool?
He scolded himself with bitter contempt. But even his own harsh judgment couldn't snap his mind back into place.
A man with a long, preening mustache approached to strike up a conversation, but Declan’s entire focus remained locked on the woman across the room.
[Hayden] “I think I’ve fallen in love at first sight.”
His words echoed in his ears like a recurring taunt. Declan rubbed his temples, unable to focus on the person speaking to him.
They’ll probably marry.
The outcome was easy to predict. Hayden was arguably the most beloved royal in the history of the Empire. He possessed the looks, the bloodline, and a charming personality—a perfect trifecta.
While most royals were born with an arrogance that bordered on the offensive, Hayden was remarkably polite. Even the most stubborn palace officials doted on him as if he were their own son.
A handsome, kind-hearted man was a prize in any lady’s social circle. There wasn't a woman in high society who would dream of rejecting him.
That girl will be no different.
The ending was already written. Even if she wasn't interested now, she would eventually succumb to Hayden’s charms. Declan himself had once been drawn in by that same warmth. Hayden’s kindness was his most lethal weapon.
A life where Hayden even gets the woman he loves at first sight without effort. In his world, the word "hardship" didn't exist. It was the exact opposite of Declan’s life, which had been a constant stretch of grey clouds without a single sunrise.
[Declan] “……”
As he dwelled on that thought, a dark, seductive impulse began to stir within him.
Hardship.
He repeated the word in his mind like a mantra while staring at Vanessa Rohawk. Judging by Hayden’s reaction, this wasn't just a passing interest. The Prince had been acting like a total idiot over this woman.
She was Hayden’s spring breeze.
But what if Hayden couldn't have her?
Would he break? Would he cry? Would he finally feel the weight of rage?
The moment he imagined Hayden’s radiant face crumbling in despair, he felt an indescribable rush of pleasure.
Hayden looked down on him with pity. There would be nothing more satisfying than watching that man lose the woman he loved to the very person he felt sorry for.
Once the thought took root, it consumed him. His logic and instincts began to weave a web of justifications for why he had to approach her.
As Declan looked up, he saw her leaving the hall. The timing was perfect. He set down his glass and followed her.
He tracked her quietly to a second-floor balcony. The lady stepped outside, glancing around as if she didn't want to be seen. She clearly had no idea she was being followed.
Reaching the door, Declan pulled a cigar from his pocket to use as a cover.
Just before he opened the door, his heart gave a strange, uneven thud.
Creak.
Vanessa Rohawk spun around, startled. Her face, framed by the moonlit garden behind her, looked ethereal. The night garden was beautiful, but in her presence, the flowers seemed to lose their color.
She blinked at him like a startled rabbit, then quickly bowed.
[Vanessa] "It is an honor to meet you, Your Grace. I am Vanessa Rohawk."
[Declan] "Do you need me to leave?"
He spoke, trying his best to sound casual.
He watched her closely, searching for any sign of suspicion. Her eyes widened, suggesting she thought this was a chance encounter.
[Vanessa] "Pardon?"
She tilted her head in confusion, then waved her hands as she realized his meaning.
He stepped forward to stand beside her.
He had acted boldly, but the truth was that he had no idea how to woo a woman. He bit down on the filter of his cigar, his internal anxiety masked by a cold exterior as he searched for something to say.
Then, he felt her gaze. Vanessa Rohawk was looking directly at him. Caught off guard by her direct stare, he blurted out the first thing that came to mind.
[Declan] "Do you want one?"
He regretted the words the second they left his mouth.
You idiot.
Of all the things to say, he had offered a cigar to a debutante during their first meeting. It was beyond rude; it was a social disaster. If she took offense and snapped at him, he would have no defense. He felt like hitting himself.
He was just about to give up on his grand plan to charm her when he heard it.
A clear, melodic laugh.
He turned toward her, his expression stiff. Vanessa Rohawk was smiling—a radiant, breathtaking smile. He managed to keep his face neutral, but inside, he was reeling.
He couldn't take his eyes off her. It was the same magnetic pull he had felt in the banquet hall.
[Declan] "If not, then forget it. You were staring."
Seeing her laugh at his blunder made the back of his neck feel hot. He spat out another remark just to shake off the strange sensation, only to regret it again. He felt as if his mouth had suddenly lost its filter.
Yet the woman didn't stop laughing. The sound was like music, light and pleasant to the ear.
[Vanessa] "I apologize if I made you uncomfortable. It’s just that it is rare to see someone of your stature so closely..."
She offered a simple explanation for her staring.
Then, the conversation died.
Declan had never been alone with a woman before. He had no idea how to bridge the silence or what topics were appropriate. Left with no choice, he leaned against the railing and pretended to smoke, watching her out of the corner of his eye.
Good grief.
He was struck by her beauty all over again. He finally understood why Hayden had been acting so foolishly.
She was impressive from across a room, but up close, her features were delicate beyond words. Even if he tried to find a flaw, he knew he would fail.
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